Your Children and the Internet

31 Jan 2010 @ 9:12 PM

Protect Children While You Can

The internet kills and ruins lives. There are police task forces dedicated to preventing such crimes but you should know how it can happen before you turn your children loose to explore it for themselves. You should wonder how this could happen to your children while you are monitoring everything they do. The internet thrusts us parents into some new responsibilities.

A child’s misconceptions make him or her vulnerable. You may have forgotten the youthful misconception that adults have total freedom and can do whatever they please. Of course, you still felt you had the right to always know what your parents were doing. It was very scary not knowing. Children want to be grownup so they can have that freedom and privacy. It is understandable to want to practice too soon. Society doesn’t help by telling them they have a right to privacy, that translates into a right to get into trouble without anyone knowing.

Adults don’t even have a right to privacy. We find that out quickly when we do things for which society disapproves. We are privileged to feel a level of privacy in our own home but it is not guaranteed. Children should understand that privacy is not even a right for adults and not resent being monitored. We may feel our children have earned our trust but there will always be hazards they are not prepared to understand.

If you think you understand the hazards you have not been made aware of criminals always coming up with new ideas for executing their craft. We are all vulnerable but children lack the experience and need the benefit of yours. If you allow them to persuade you to leave them alone you could be the one left alone. I am not being dramatic. All children are targets but the victims can be any child with the ability to make themselves unattended, even while you sleep. You can’t watch them 24/7 but there are things you can do.

Children’s needs make them vulnerable. Everyone needs approval, especially the young. You love them more than anyone ever will, even their future spouse. You may not know it but when it comes down to the wire you may even surprise yourself. They will always crave more approval than you can give them because it is your responsibility to guide them through life, correct them when they make mistakes, and sometimes punish them to reinforce the rules.

Predators know this. They know they can be the kind of friend or parent your child feels they need. All a predator needs is an ever so slight amount of time to convince your child of this. After that, children create the time. Emotions cloud judgment as someone finally responds to their need for acceptance. Predators are predators because they have a silver tongue and can even make friends with parents of their young victims.

They can size up people in a minute and adjust their words to suit the occasion. This is always true because without that ability they would be a lonely person with evil fantasies. They can tell your child the things your child wants to hear . Any child is eager to believe what they want to hear. The predator can devote eight or more hours a day to being their whenever your child is upset, happy or just lonely and fill their heads with impossibilities that no good person would promise.

The parenting skills for real life apply even more on the internet. If you would not and should not allow a teacher to keep a single student alone after school in order to avoid the opportunity for inappropriate behavior it is even more true that you would not allow your child to be alone with the internet in their room. With pocket internet by iPhone and Droid that should be even more important. Time on a crowded school bus could be spent alone with a predator. You can protect your children though, even if you can’t compete with the predators’ time, lies, and lack of responsibility.

A child’s online activities are not private. Anyone can capture their data once it goes over the internet. People all over the world can download free software to do just that. Social sites collect the information in databases that can be searched. If an account is deleted the information is still there. If your child is suspected of breaking laws the police can get a warrant to look at their computer and yours to see if the evidence is there. The legal responsibility for what is on their computer is yours. You could be the only person not viewing your child’s information if you believe they have a right to privacy.

This is how you can protect your child. Use parental controls software designed to protect children. It is part of Windows Vista or if you have Windows XP you can download the FREE We-Blocker Safe Families Software fro safefamilies.org. You can restrict their browsing with software but you should know they can get around them. If you have FREE keyloggers or monitoring software, like K9 Web Protection (FREE), or monitor from anywhere with PC Pandora ($70-110), you will know everything they do and will be able to talk to them about it. If you aren’t monitoring and don’t know what they are doing, you can’t be sure they are safe.

Internet Safety for Kids and Families covers a wide-range of issues, such as cyberbullying, risky social networking, age-inappropriate content, and identity theft. Internet behavior involves the knowlege of what should and shouldn’t be revealed and knowing what is actually a crime that can effect the child and parent. Peers can convince children that some things are acceptable while the law will prosecute. You must be sure that you children understand that. Monitor them and let them know it but not necessarily how.

You still need to keep up to date on new threats and new responsibilities. Here are some outstanding organizations:
Related Page: References
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Related Pages: Motivating Teen Safety